


An unexpected broomance.

by IceBreeze



Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-23
Updated: 2016-10-23
Packaged: 2018-08-24 04:37:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8357500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IceBreeze/pseuds/IceBreeze
Summary: Allison finds a surprise in her living room.





	

**Author's Note:**

> [Inspired by this post.](http://mikk.co.vu/post/130050522733/heres-a-concept-me-riding-your-ceiling-fan-like)
> 
>  
> 
> Did someone ask for crack? No? Well here it is anyway. (I had so much fun writing this). Title is irrelevant apart from the fact that i wanted a pun and there is a broom.

If there was something Allison expected to find in her living room when she came home, it would have been Renee back from work early or even Dan coming around to leech from their fridge. It was certainly not this... whatever the hell this is supposed to be. Because, needless to say, the sight of Kevin Day- the oversized beanpole that probably gave a blowjob to an exy stick at some point in his very narrow life- standing in the middle of the room whilst brandishing a broom was not something people generally expect to see in like, ever. Yes, a broom. A genuine, bonafide broom. Allison couldn’t believe it either.

_(In the first place, is that her broom? If so, when the fuck did she get a broom? How did they get it? Did Day rob a museum for cleaning implements or something?)_

But that was not all, no. Apparently you can’t just have a bit of crazy you’ve got to pile all the shit in there, else it won’t be true bullshit. To top the whole thing of, he was screaming (and oh boy, does he have a voice like a banshee. Remind her to make him watch a horror movie and film it. Actually, that wouldn’t work. A bonfire made from exy sticks. Yeah, perfect). At the ceiling fan. Whilst trying to hit it with the broom. Are you following? No? Good, because Allison herself lost the ability to understand it long ago. And then it became clear that her ceiling fan- which she was rather fond of, thank you very much- was now seat to Neil Josten. Or what she thinks is Neil Josten, as she can’t really make it out clearly because it’s spinning too fast. 

_(She sees alot of orange and red in the blur- two colours that she’s pretty sure only Josten would be seen dead in. Or alive, because that child plays with death too often for comfort and by now she half expected he’d wear a bin bag if needed. So she’s gonna go with Josten, unless there’s a secret lovechild no-one told her about who had the misfortune to inherit his lack of a fashion sense. Shit, she wished she had alcohol right now. This situation would be more amusing if she didn’t have logic behind her. Or in her. Whatever)._

At this point she began to wonder if she had accidentally inhaled some drugs or something because that is the only logical explanation she can think of for any of this crap. Unless it was a dream. Ouch. Okay, not a dream because that hurt like hell. The lump-now-dubbed-Josten was yelling (and bless the lungs on that boy, she’d never heard so many insults screamed from the top of a spinny thing) and Day was yelling and this appeared to be a kinky or extremely drunk version of hit the pinata. Her money was on drunk because, for a man so obsessed with exy, Day had the worst aim she’d ever seen. 

_(Also she really didn’t want to imagine kinky and Day in the same sentence. Ew. Just ew. Mind bleach would be nice right about now)._

Neither of them appeared to have noticed her, so she took a moment to stare and think. And think. And think before deciding _fuck it_. If she had to deal with this shit, then she was sure as hell going to get some entertainment out of it. So she did what any reasonable person would do by taking out her phone and videoing it. 

_(And photographing it, sending the image to everyone she knew)._

With that done she turned around and walked away. Far far away, because it wasn’t her problem. She was refusing to accept it as one. She wasn’t the appointed babysitter, not today. Not ever. Ugh, she shudders at the thought. Climbing into her car, she shot a text to the monster with the video attached, saying:

_‘Remove your’ boyfriend and manchild from my living room before childservices get them.’_

With the vague desire to witness how that interaction would go outweighed by the need to get away from this huge fucking mess, Allison drove over to Dan’s after warning Renee of the situation in their living room. And that they may need a new ceiling fan. As she drove, her lips curled into a smirk reminiscent of a predator closing in on their prey, eyes narrowing with a glimmer of intention that would have Hemmick running in the opposite direction.

She had a video to share with the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Can be found on [tumblr, polyhymina.](http://polyhymina.tumblr.com/writings)


End file.
